Why Product Over People? Reprioritizing Mental Health in the Workplace. - S03E03

On this episode, Kristin and Ralph head off to the gun range and take aim at the mindset of product over people, why mental health is so devalued in the US, why the Great Resignation is a good thing, finding a job that fits into your life and not the other way around, and being a spy with a weakness for chocolate chip cookies.

Don’t forget to rate our show and give us a follow, a like, or subscribe! We love what we do and want to inspire MORE people to ask MORE questions and have MORE interesting conversations. And check out our YouTube channel to see us in action and hear stuff that didn’t make the cut for the podcast. 

DISCLAIMER:
The views expressed on the Hey Let Me Ask You Something Podcast are solely the opinions of your hosts Kristin Wood and Ralph Andracchio and are based on their years of practical and clinical experience. These opinions do not constitute any kind of advice, diagnosis, or treatment of any mental, physical, or emotional issues. If you are having an emergency or any serious ongoing situations please contact your local hospital or a trusted professional. 

Kristin's Website
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Transcript

The Hey Let Me Ask You Something Podcast
Season 03
Episode 03
Why Product Over People? Reprioritizing Mental Health in the Workplace.

[MUSIC INTRO PLAYS] - 00:00

Intro Voiceover - 00:08
You’ve found the only podcast that can tell their abc’s from their nbc’s and cbs’sss…Hey Let Me Ask You Something. On this episode, Kristin and Ralph head off to the gun range and take aim at the mindset of product over people, why mental health is so devalued in the US, why the Great Resignation is a good thing, finding a job that fits into your life and not the other way around, and being a spy with a weakness for chocolate chip cookies. 

Don’t forget to rate our show and give us a follow, a like, or subscribe! We love what we do and want to inspire MORE people to ask MORE questions and have MORE interesting conversations. And check out our YouTube channel to see us in action and hear stuff that didn’t make the cut for the podcast. 

And as always the views expressed on the Hey Let Me Ask You Something Podcast are solely the opinions of your hosts Kristin Wood and Ralph Andracchio and are based on their years of practical and clinical experience. These opinions do not constitute any kind of advice, diagnosis, or treatment of any mental, physical, or emotional issues. If you are having an emergency or any serious ongoing situations please contact your local hospital or a trusted professional. You can find this complete disclaimer on our podcast homepage. And now… on with the show! 

Kristin Wood - 01:30
And action

Ralph Andracchio - 01:37  
[Ralph hums the Action News theme music] If you're not in Philadelphia, you have no idea what that music is. But for us, it's the Action News Theme. Good old channel six.

Kristin Wood - 01:45  
Shout out to Channel Six. That's my news channel.

Ralph Andracchio - 01:48  
That's right we talked about that last time. 

Kristin Wood - 01:50  
I'm not mad at NBC, but I'm an ABC girl. I second to NBC if there's a problem with ABC programming.

Ralph Andracchio - 01:58  
I like NBC. ABC is okay CBS what what

Kristin Wood - 02:06  
No, I don't do channel three. Here it's channel three but wherever everyone else is.

Ralph Andracchio - 02:09  
Yeah, yeah, you and I could always tell like when you're growing up, they all look different. So no matter what kind of show you're watching, even if there wasn't that little bug in the corner that told you what what station you're watching, I can always tell which station it was because each of them has this specific like visual look to them. You know what I mean? 

Kristin Wood - 0 2:28  
I know what you mean, but it's hard to explain. 

Ralph Andracchio - 02:32  
It's hard to explain it's like not the grain of the film but it's like something the way everything shot or broadcast like you can tell oh that CBS or like oh, that's NBC. 

Kristin Wood - 02:43  
If they could pull Hoda on to ABC ABC be perfect because they do love me a Hoda. I love Hoda. She's on NBC. And I do like her.

Ralph Andracchio - 02:54  
She Yeah, her and Kathie Lee Right. Or is that still a thing?

Kristin Wood - 02:58  
No. It's Jenna Bush. Sorry, Jenna. I'm not a huge fan of...

Ralph Andracchio - 03:02  
Jenna Bush. What happened? What happened to Kathie Lee Gifford sorry, I'm getting comfortable...

Kristin Wood - 03:07 
She's done she's on her singing career. 

Ralph Andracchio - 03:10
But she's she's doing her singing career again. Okay. That's a nice thing to be able to return to Just making sure my bellies not hanging out. 

Kristin Wood - 03:20
Mine is I'm wearing the flowy sweater

Ralph Andracchio - 03:22  
This shirt is a little short. A little tight, little tight. Little short. Little tummy well I should I'm want to shrink the tummy so the shirt, it's been hard to get the the last like, I have 10 pounds that I gained over the holidays. I'm trying to get rid of.

Kristin Wood - 03:44  
Well those cookies were not are not helping because don't think I didn't see them in there. They looked delicious

Ralph Andracchio - 03:48  
I am on a cookie baking kick right now. Yeah, they're not. They're not from scratch. They're store bought, but they're like the ones you still have to put in the oven and cook. Because they're just they taste better. And they're like gooey and delicious. 

Kristin Wood - 04:04
Yeah, they looked gooey and delicious. 

Ralph Andracchio - 04:06
I'm such a sucker. If you I would be the worst spy in the world. Because if you just put a plate of freshly made chocolate chip cookies in front of me, I will tell you anything you want to know. Honestly, like I can't. What's the secret codes for what I'll never tell is that chocolate chip cookies?. Well, it starts with the seven

Kristin Wood - 04:26  
And it's really the chocolate chip cookie that that is my cookie. 

Ralph Andracchio - 04:29
Yeah. What's your second? 

Kristin Wood - 04:32
Um, I similar to still kind of a chocolate chip. I like the ones with the peanut m&ms in them.

Ralph Andracchio - 04:40  
Oooooo. Yeah, no, I agree with you there. I like the almond ones that m&ms with almonds in them.

Kristin Wood - 04:48  
Oh no I don't well I like almonds so I could rock those...

Ralph Andracchio - 04:49  
Yeah it's good. Because peanuts hurt my tummy sometimes like peanut butter and peanuts. I don't I'm not like I won't die. But it's like my stomach's like, no. Yeah, I enjoy that too. 

Kristin Wood - 05:01
How was your week? 

Ralph Andracchio - 05:03
Okay, okay, it's still like still finding my footing from the beginning of the year. It's been slow, All Quiet on the Western Front. But still really enjoying it. I have a lot of irons in the fire for stuff that's going to be going on. Personal wise we closed on our refi So if I'm if you're familiar if you've been watching or listening to the program, you know that Dan and I are trying to redo our kitchen and our our main bathroom because they're terrible and they're broken and they stink, Well, we have to shut our water off to the kitchen every winter because the pipes are too close to the outside. And they freeze so we don't want to do that and more. So we finally refinance our house we got a lower percentage rate, which is amazing. We went from a 30 year to a 15 year which is also amazing. We're not paying that much more which is great. And we have enough money now that we can do the kitchen and the main bathroom and have a little bit leftover. I'm I'm doing the thing where I know how much money we have, but I my budget is like 10,000 less. So I'm like let's try to come in here. And then that way if anything pops up, we have a contingency. I've watched enough HGTV shows to know, you always need to have a contingency budget because inevitably they're going to open the walls and they're going to be like

Kristin Wood - 06:27
There's a whole family of termites. 

Ralph Andracchio - 06:30  
There's a - you have a whole family of mules living in your walls. So it's like that's what that noise was. it's gonna be 10 grand just to kick them out. Can't put hay down and like lure them out, So yeah, that's that's what that's the big thing that's happening around the old Andracchio Kelly homestead. What about you?

Kristin Wood - 06:49  
Um, well work is picking up Um, there's definitely some I'm getting more calls. I've added a few clients still have availability, but that's encouraging. And then I did a really cool thing that's so out of my comfort zone on Friday night. 

Ralph Andracchio - 07:05
What did you do? 

Kristin Wood - 07:06
I shot a gun. 

Ralph Andracchio - 07:07
Did you really? 

Kristin Wood - 07:08
I did

Ralph Andracchio - 07:10  
Tell me about it.

Kristin Wood - 07:11  
I just were excited that I did it then actually like the act of doing it.

Ralph Andracchio - 07:15
Did you go to a gun range?

Kristin Wood - 07:16
Yeah. In South Philly.

Ralph Andracchio - 07:18  
Oh, there's one right around here.

Kristin Wood - 07:19  
I think it's right up the street from you. Yeah, yeah, I went with a friend of mine who is a police officer so clearly knows how to shoot a gun. And he taught me and I hit the targets and stuff.

Ralph Andracchio - 07:32  
I hit the target. How close did you get to the middle.

Kristin Wood - 07:36  
I think I got a couple near like Yeah, I mean, it wasn't the hardest thing in the world. I mean, I think your accuracy obviously was not that great, but it was just really out of my comfort zone. Something I would not have done but I thought about doing that. It's kind of like excited that I just did and then at the end I was like I went into the bathroom because you wear glasses obviously we had a mask on and then ear, um what do you call those?

Ralph Andracchio - 08:01  
The ear protection. Ear muffs? It's not ear muffs either. Why can't we... we're both adults.

Kristin Wood - 08:07  
They're horribly uncomfortable. But uh, I went to the bathroom at the very end and I was like, Oh my God, there's gunpowder on my cheek and I got very excited about it.

Ralph Andracchio - 08:20  
You're now a vigilante.

Kristin Wood - 08:21
Yeah, I was like that was very exciting. 

Ralph Andracchio - 08:24  
That is exciting. What kind of gun was it? Was it a little nine millimeter?

Kristin Wood - 08:26  
Oh, no. Well, it was a I guess the ones the cops carry nine millimeters. I don't again, I don't know, like a little shot on thing. I don't know. Revolver - revolver and then he had a rifle like an AK 45 47 Something like that. Those are very heavy. Very heavy. Like he was trying to give me like a tutorial and he's like, I have had me holding the gun up. I'm like, I gotta put it down. Like I can't hold this thing.

Ralph Andracchio - 09:00 
Like I would see that show with you in the army. I'm tired.

Kristin Wood - 09:02
I have video. I could show you video when we're done of me shooting. 

Ralph Andracchio - 09:05
Oh, I would love to see that. Yeah, I grew up around guns. I grew up on a farm in the country. So we had guns my you know, to protect our chickens and stuff, sounds like Little House on the Prairie. And we went to that gun range for one of our friend's bachelor parties. And I remember I got all the it was all bullseye.

Kristin Wood - 09:26  
I don't really like shooting a paper. It felt like if they had like fake fake animals like little fake ones. You could just see them and be knocked down because the paper sometimes it's hard to see where you hit especially with with the bigger one, because the bullets are smaller. I'm like, Did I hit anything? Did I not hit anything? So because I want to kill anything. It's just because I feel like shooting at the actual target of something. I would feel better. 

Ralph Andracchio - 09:50
So you want to have the thing at the carnival where you hit it and it goes PTING and the thing falls down. Yeah ok.

Kristin Wood - 09:56
So maybe that'll be next

Ralph Andracchio - 09:57  
Ok. Well now we've had we unlocked a hidden talent now 

Kristin Wood - 10:00
No

Ralph Andracchio - 10:02
Would you ever own a gun?

Kristin Wood - 10:04  
No. At one point I'm talking and I'm doing this and he's like put the gun down!

Ralph Andracchio - 10:07  
Oh, yeah. Talking with your hands and everything.

Kristin Wood - 10:10  
I mean, I didn't have my hand - my finger on the trigger. But there's also like 10 times in the least during where you'd be like, take your finger off the trigger. I was pointing the right way but like take your finger off the trigger. I was so patient

Ralph Andracchio - 10:23  
Yeah they that's it's a rest thing or whatever.

Kristin Wood - 10:27  
It's like a Yeah, I wasn't gonna shoot it but it was there. 

Ralph Andracchio - 10:30  
You can always you can always tell when they're doing it right in the movies and TV because they have their their pointer finger like off the trigger on the side of the gun. Like that's what you're supposed to do as I know that much. That's exciting.

Kristin Wood - 10:41  
Anyway, we just spent 10 minutes talking about guns

Ralph Andracchio - 10:44  
Eh that's fine. We need more NRA members as yeah as Audience members

Kristin Wood - 10:51  
I don't think I'll be owning a gun but

Ralph Andracchio - 10:53  
All right. Yeah, I don't I don't think I would if anything, and my friends laugh at me when I say this instead of a gun. I would rather own like a crossbow or something. And they're like super impractical. And if you miss that's it because you don't get a second shot. They're not gonna be like, hold on a second. Yeah. I thought it would be intimidating, but they're like, No, a gun is actually more intimidating. I was like, All right, I would just think it would be it would be more jarring to have like an arrow sticking out of you rather than

Kristin Wood - 11:23  
Right I know what I mean get the bow or whatever the crossbow get the arrow and actually shoot the perpetrator in time. All that sounds like a lot.

Ralph Andracchio - 11:31  
I know. It wasn't practical. But you know, I never think ahead. It's always the looks of everything. I'll see maybe I'll invent something. Well, they have those ones that you wear on your wrist. There's a little like wrist. 

Kristin Wood - 11:47  
So you're gonna wear that around at home. Did you discuss this with Dan?

Ralph Andracchio -11:50  
Yeah, I want that Apple over there. And maybe I'll have to attach a wire to it and then they'll just pull stuff.... when I want the remote. We'll go through a lot of remotes like that. Any who's another day another episode we we had to change plans quickly. We had guests that were scheduled for today and one of them fell ill. We wish him a speedy recovery. But it got us thinking and we had a long conversation before the show even started. 

Kristin Wood - 12:25  
You mean I ranted 

Ralph Andracchio - 12:27  
You ranted for 20 minutes. And I thought it was a good question. So we're like why don't we just do that? Because I'm sure it's a question that a lot of other people have. And it's why is I don't want to put it the way it is in my head. We can kind of deconstruct it, but why is the product more important than the person when it comes to business? And I mean in terms of sick leave, or like getting sick physical health, mental health, anything where it's like, I need to take care of myself for a minute because something is wrong. And it's like, you are easily replaced if it's like the product that you provide is more important than you as a person.

Kristin Wood - 13:08  
Yep. Yeah. And even the hoops people have to go through to get short term disability or medical leave, for some places has a lot of hoops for them to go through when they're obviously already not good not well, to even be able to get it I think they could make that a little simpler.

Ralph Andracchio - 13:27  
Why why is it that way though? Like why when did we maybe this has been what it has been forever and I am just looking at the world through rose colored contact lenses but why has it always been that way where you're easily replaced or like it's it's more important like why 

Kristin Wood - 13:48  
I think it's actually getting better.

Ralph Andracchio - 13:52  
For some maybe,

Kristin Wood - 13:54  
I mean, I don't know. I mean, I wasn't alive 60 years ago, but 

Ralph Andrachio - 14:00 
Well, you look good.

Kristin Wood - 14:02  
But I almost said 50 years. And then I was like well it's too close. Um, but I feel like there was, first of all, we talked mental health. There was no where people didn't know what that was or that wasn't an okay thing or people didn't like, respect that self care. I feel like all that stuff. Mental Health Awareness and taking care of self is a newish emphasis is new. I don't know, obviously because we're talking about this thing. I don't think it's still work needs to be by any means. But yeah, I think there's this okay, you went you filled out all these papers and now you can take some time but either get back when you said you're going to get back or the second you do get back the expectation you're going to just be up and running. Right You know, I'm I'm thinking of something right now. So I'll just say yes. So I had a client that went away to an inpatient residential treatment program. And, you know, when they came back, and even a little bit now it was they felt I'm not sure if this was happening, that their family expected them to just jump right back in and, you know, stay with you for a little while. And then and I think they actually started to put the pressure and they often the pressure on themselves to in which this should be the timeline, the timeline has been longer. than it should be. And, and it's like, just like, do they not prepare people for the fact that when somebody comes back from an intensive treatment, medical or mental health or addiction, that you don't just jump right back in and like, pick up where you left off, then have to re acclimate? And get yourself back together to be able to perform all those regular life stuff when you've been out sick? So that just made me think of that. It's just another example of people, not just companies, but like, people's expectations of one another. 

Ralph Andracchio - 16:11  
Yeah. And something that I didn't think of before but you just brought it up is not only does the person who has the recovering to do need the space and time to kind of get back to where they were previously or like back to a good baseline or whatever. The people around them also are ill equipped to give them the time because I don't think as a society, we are comfortable with health issues in general. And we don't know how to take care of each other.

Kristin Wood - 16:52  
I think with physical health, it's a little bit better than mental health because you can't see mental health It can't see all physical health either. You can't necessarily always see cancer, you can't always necessarily see something else. You can't see. Yeah, I'm at a loss. We all get what I can't see it. Unless somebody is in a wheelchairs. Something like that and they weren't prior to so because mental health is not seen and some physical health as well, I feel like people are like, Oh, you're fine now. Oh, you went and you got fixed this this mentality, like you're going somewhere and you're getting fixed. And now you're you're you're back and let's go,

Ralph Andracchio - 17:42  
Right. We don't want to talk about it. It's like okay, everything's back the way it was great. Let's move on because we're so uncomfortable with the idea of I don't I don't know if it's that we're what popped into my head when you were talking about it's mental health has not seen like physical or physical sometimes physical health issues cannot be seen. I it's reading sometimes I read these stories online of people who are like, policing handicap spots, at the in the in like parking lots I don't even know if they're called that anymore. Are they? Are this parking spots like special parking spots towards the front of the Yeah, for disabled disabled people? I'm sorry if I said handicapped. I wasn't. I don't know. 

Kristin Wood - 18:29  
Well, they still call it that right on the sign. 

Ralph Andracchio - 18:34  
I just want to make sure I'm calling it the correct thing. But people who have the placards and everything but don't look like and then like Joe Schmo or like Karen comes out and it's like, you can't park there you don't have a disability and they're like, who are you? You know, I think it's seen it's not seen as oh, this person needs that spot or needs the help or needs a little extra time to do stuff. It's like you're taking the easy way out or like you're being lazy or something and it's it's this weird mentality that surrounds any kind of, I need assistance, or I'm not I'm not 100% Right now I need. I need like understanding and space and help and I think we're all generally as a society, ill equipped to help people when they're like that.

Kristin Wood - 19:30  
Yeah, I think of somebody visibly is not well, then there's a totally different response. You know, if we see somebody I don't know somebody passed out or somebody overdosed, or, or something like that people are all there to rush in and then make sure they're okay, granted, they could die so I get it but or if somebody's, again in a wheelchair or has their disability is seen by others. It's more obvious. People treat them different than somebody who could also be disabled or also being an addict or also be whatever, you know, that you can't see.

Ralph Andracchio - 20:16  
Yeah. Yeah. Is it are we so quick to rush to people's aid because they're not there to kind of interact with or, or talk back or like, why are we so ready to help somebody who's passed out rather than somebody who's saying I need help?

Kristin Wood - 20:38  
I don't know that. That's it. It's just so in your face there's a problem or difficult. More problem, a struggle or maybe think like think about it? Is somebody just if you just look at the way somebody is walking across the street, if sometimes people especially in Philadelphia, no offense Philly, love you, but you know people will just kind of like blow through crosswalks. But you see someone in a wheelchair, you see a totally different response. Then person able bodied looking person crossing Street. It's just like when it's obvious or even just pregnant woman versus not pregnant woman that being pregnant is a disability, but just the way people treat. It's like, oh, okay, they should get they should doing air quotes or trying to without spilling wine. They should. We should help them out. We should give them some extra attention. And there's like so many people that need the help me the understanding, I guess that don't get it because you just it's not that blatant that we can see it.

Ralph Andracchio - 21:45  
Why are we so unwilling? And again, I'm speaking in generalizations but as a society, it seems we're so unwilling at some time at some points to give that help freely. Is it because we're afraid people are freeloaders? Or like they're gaming the system or it's like, you don't really deserve the help or I just I always default to like, Oh, I'm going to help you. I you know, do you need my help? No. Great or like, Yes, awesome. What can I do now? And I feel like that's sometimes missing. Like we'd rather we'd rather keep our head down and not get involved.

Kristin Wood - 22:26  
I wonder sometimes too. If it's about judgment of others Like, again, back to the crosswalk example. If you're driving and you blow through a crosswalk and let's take out somebody that's probably frowned upon a little bit. Or you go in front of a pedestrian, make them wait whatever you do. That with somebody who's visibly has a disability, whatever it is wheelchair or whatever. You're really getting, you know, others around you really like that's a terrible person. So sometimes I also think a lot of people their head in the clouds. They're like, if I don't see it, it's not there and bla bla bla bla bla and when it's in your face, you can't help but see it. So you like I guess they feel forced to or want to I can't want to be negative but to act in a certain way.

Ralph Andracchio -  23:22  
Yeah. And we're and especially with employment or like, when you're when you need time, or space or extra accommodation to work somewhere even if it's if it's slight. Companies especially are very against it seems like giving people that time and space to work where they want to work and do the work they want to do because it's like, extra added something but who are you inconveniencing like what's the inconvenience and you can't really pin it down?

Kristin Wood - 24:04  
I think it's like we don't want to show favoritism, then we don't want other employees to say well, why can't I do that? Bla bla bla

Ralph Andracchio - 24:11  
it seems like it's it's catering towards the exceptions. Rather than like the general rule that people are more likely than not are happy to help and willing to we've talked about this in another episode. People are more likely than we think to want to help and want to be good people. And I feel like a lot of times these these rules especially when it comes to corporations like hiring people, and I keep coming back to that when people those questions they ask you during interviews about oh can you lift? Are you comfortable lifting 25 pounds and can you stand for long? That's all designed to prevent a lawsuit or prevent them hiring somebody who may have a disability and who needs at the extra accommodation?

Kristin Wood - 24:58  
Yeah, I mean I get it if your the whole job is a physical job. I think there's some level you have to know something right I mean, but they asked that with other for the last time that like I'm trying to think of an example like working in target from they might be asking that I don't know and the more for target but like they ask for jobs that are not all physical.

Ralph Andracchio - 25:21  
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I don't know. It bugs me that that that is like something that we do that. Is it a time? Is it a money saving thing? Is that like you said, is it a healthcare thing? Is there money? Is there a price tag put on it if you hire somebody who needs the extra accommodation? More paperwork or something?

Kristin Wood - 25:52  
Depends what the accommodations are.

Ralph Andracchio -  25:54  
I just I feel like I'm probably looking at it through like, not not a practical framework, but it just feels wrong to me. You know,

Kristin Wood - 26:07  
Yeah, I was gonna go on my little tangent. You know, I was earlier when I was ranting this is in regards to sports, but it could probably apply. I just really have a problem with with it's usually within the industry or the within the actual what am I trying to say

Ralph Andracchio - 26:26  
The sports complex.

Kristin Wood - 26:30  
Yeah, or the sports world, whatever the sport is, but the way that different people have been treated when they're struggling with like a mental health problem, or yeah, I'll just say mental health problems, because the ones that come to mind are for me are Naomi Osaka, who's a very young, professional tennis player. And though I did not like the way the Tennis Association, I guess, some very famous people were talking when she didn't do an interview. And they kept going on and talk about the interview. And it's, she knows there's an interview and that's part of her contract. And I was like, Ah, come on, like she's struggling with mental health. She doesn't give a crap about an interview and she's in a bad state. And they just kept talking to me it was ignorant. And to me, it was like missing the entire issue and bothered me it's bothered me more than one time, but I did realize I did here recently and I don't remember his name. And I really loved this. It was a football player who had been out for mental health problems. And was there was no one no one was sugarcoating this. Clearly he wasn't. He actually was saying, whatever it was, I don't know the details. This is why I'm not playing this week or that week. And I really applauded him especially in such a you know, macho masculine sport and being a man and how hard that can be that he was able to do that. But I have some a really big bug about the fact that all of a sudden, it's about money, it's about the business. It's about the rules. And it's like, if we're human beings, people struggle.

Kristin Wood - 28:10  
This girl from tennis is a young person. She's like, 20 - 21, she's hit the limelight early and who knows what else is going on her life? I have no idea. And lots of us go through that when you're famous under the spotlight, scrutiny and criticism. It just pisses me off to be quite honest

Ralph Andracchio - 28:26  
And yeah, it is it is infuriating to see it and I think in my mind, there's two things going on there. Number one, again, the product is more important than the person because these sports figures. They bring in a lot of money for these organizations. And if you're not acting within this certain spectrum of acceptable behavior, you run the risk of not bringing in as much money or changing the fans idea of you, you know which, which I would I would respect the sports player the sports ball people even more, if they were honest, like that football player was about what's happening because they're in a better spot, more than anybody else to advocate for and bring people's attention to mental health as something that's important, like mental health advocacy, you know,

Kristin Wood - 29:26  
Well, that's changing now and that's very refreshing. A lot more people are speaking of you see the celebrities and people in the media are saying or coming out saying I have bipolar or I have this or and they're being more open and honest. And I think that's amazing for physical health as well as mental health. I love that that's happening more and that it's making them more real, I think also, but just also I don't want to say normalizing it, but I guess that's the right way of saying it that hey, lots of us go through this just even people on TV that make lots of money. And so that's one of the things I've really really liked that I've seen happening even this morning I was watching this is a little bit different but I was watching Good Morning America and 

Ralph Andracchio - 30:16
ABCs gonna have to start giving us money

Kristin Wood - 30:21  
Amy Schumer was talking about the fact that she got liposuction proudly. And I was like, Alright girl like I liked that. And I thought again, not that I want to go get liposuction, but that she would just be transparent and talk about chess. I had endometriosis and has been through a lot of health problems that are very serious, but she had to add that part in Right, right. She did though, and I really liked that.

Ralph Andracchio - 30:46  
Well that I'm glad you said that. Because that brings up the other point I was thinking about when you're talking about Naomi Osaka is it's different for men versus women for people who identify or are present as men versus people who present as women. The standards are different. And we're talking about Amy Schumer, I just kept thinking to myself, men want women to look a certain way. But berate them for actually getting a procedure done to have them look that way that you want them to look. And yeah, it's like a no win situation. And we may be getting off topic, but I think it's still it's still connected to what we'd started out with before. Of like the product is more important than the person. Even just how we present on a daily basis is sometimes like ridiculous, especially for for women and female, female presenting people that there's this ridiculously weird level of scrutiny around and I actually am on tick tock if you didn't know, footpath loves. I love and tick tock and there's this video that's been making the rounds recently of this other podcast. I don't know the name of it. I can't even name it because I don't know the name of it. But it was guys sitting around talking about they were making the can not the connection but the like metaphor simile of women and men and like locks and keys and like a key that opens a bunch of different locks is a Master Lock and it's a better key or a key that opens a bunch of locks is a master key and it's a better key than other keys, but a lock that it can be opened by many keys is a crappy lock was curves. Such a spot it was Yeah. And a lot of people are are stitching those videos and like burning them down because it's ridiculous. Like the metaphor doesn't even make sense but just the the twisted into a pretzel logic of men want women to look a certain way and act a certain way and be like this chaste virginal creatures that but then, if they happen to be sexually active, then they're all of a sudden ruined and terrible and like you, you can't have sex with too many people but you want them to be knowledgeable and mature and like it's like, and then guys don't have to follow any of that. It's like, none of that makes any sense and is in no universe, either this one or any parallel universe even remotely possible.

Kristin Wood - 33:47  
Yeah, and I think not to jump back for just a second but with Amy Schumer. First of all, liposuction is very dangerous. And it's not you know, plastic surgery depends on the person and why they're doing it. I think with her the way it was presented was definitely like something that she wanted to do for herself and just the way she is anyway. I mean, she's not into like, no, but I don't know, I had to clarify that. But I felt like I did that.

Ralph Andracchio - 34:18  
Oh, it's important,

Kristin Wood - 34:19  
I think yeah, because when he talks about somebody just making a decision for themselves, it's gonna make them feel better, and that's what they're talking about. And that's why she did it. And she felt good about it. And so she's sharing it.

Ralph Andracchio - 34:32  
Yeah. Yeah, I mean, if you're doing it for yourself, and it's something that's gonna make you feel good. Do it like it doesn't doesn't matter what anybody else thinks. But that's it. We're too up and everybody's business too much all the time. Like let people be people. Yeah. Worried about your own stuff. You know, it's aggravating sometimes.

Kristin Wood - 34:55
Yeah. But I think back to the original question that yeah, there's still so much work to be done around prioritizing self care and taking care of yourself. It's still seems that we all a lot of people put a ton of pressure on themselves and allow that productivity through work to be more important than caring for themselves.

Ralph Andracchio - 35:19  
Maybe I think that's what's going into the great resignation. That's happening right now. A lot of a lot of it is and I've seen a lot of people on newscasts prognosticating about, well, why is this happening? Where's everybody going? What's happening? They don't, you know, these jobs are there and they don't want them because probably they're over there over it. Like they're over being used by a system that treats you like a cog, and you're completely replaceable, and it goes into what we've been talking about today of, you know, sure you get this job and but but if you need time, to actually be a human being that's unacceptable, and well, we're gonna need to find somebody else. Oh, you're going to be you're going to be a way how long to have a baby. No, your job will not be ready as a baby a baby like that's when you said, pregnant being pregnant isn't like a disease or like a preexisting condition? Yeah.

Kristin Wood - 36:19  
Yeah when you look at it that way Bring it up that way. Yes. I just didn't want anyone to think that I was trying to compare being pregnant as a disability in case 

Ralph Andracchio - 36:27 
Oh, no, no, yeah, I see what you're saying. No

Kristin Wood - 36:29  
I din't want to offend anyone that way. But I do think that what you're saying happens all the time. Yeah, 

Ralph Andracchio - 36:35 
yeah. And it's, it's ridic. And I know there are some countries who have a completely different idea of, you know, other than America of how mental health is actually important. And I think quality of life in those countries. far exceeds ours.

Kristin Wood - 36:49  
Oh my god, like the siesta.

Ralph Andracchio - 36:51  
Oh my God. Countries that have the siesta or like the mid afternoon, like everything closes down and people just have a drink and relax and nap and whatever. Great. Great, amazing. Maybe because we're just we were founded by Puritans, I don't know but it's just a game right now a lot of stuff in this country seems a little bit backwards. But yeah, that like stuff like that. And it all comes back to me thinking that the when that happens, people think oh, that's just people being lazy. You know, you got to work you got to earn like that. You got to earn the work hard play hard. 

Kristin Wood - 37:31
The number of times I have this conversation week is insane. Because it is so hard for not just my clients, a lot of people if you're not doing if you're just laying around or whatever or you're feeling unmotivated with work, the talk in people's heads to themselves is incredible. incredibly bad, incredibly, incredibly damaging. And it's that's what I was saying earlier that the whole being productive and performing and for some people they need to be perfect and excel at work, like taking care of themselves as like down here. It's just astounding,

Ralph Andracchio - 38:16 
And the the companies and the organizations that are going to come out on top after this great resignation, shakes out into whatever it's going to look like are the ones that are going to offer that flexibility for people who work for them. You know the the work from home, you want to work from home. Great. You want to come into the office. Great. You want to do both great. You need more time for to you know to live your life great that those are the kind of companies that are going to make out like gangbusters because people are going to want to work for them because everybody this pandemic in the quarantine and the time off and the you know working from home and being isolated it's given it was just the impetus people needed to say you know what, screw this noise. I I have too much else going on. There's there's this shared trauma that we're all going through and if my job is adding to that trauma, no thank you I'm going to find a place that actually respects me as a human being and realizes that the happier I am at home and that and the more the the job fits into my life and not the other way around. The better performance I'm going to show

Kristin Wood - 39:35  
Yup. It's not that hard. I don't know why these companies haven't figured it out. I mean, we're so smart. I know that

Ralph Andracchio - 39:42  
Just come to us companies. Yeah, but it's it's the but we're so focused, what we're in corporations I think are so focused on getting their CEOs to shoot themselves in a space that at the expense of our health, both physically and mentally and emotionally. You know, it's it's, it's ridiculous how, over the course of the pandemic, people have lost their jobs, people are going bankrupt. Stores are closing, businesses are shutting down and people are dying. And three or four old rich white dudes decided this would be a perfect time to shoot themselves in the space like can you do you notice what's happening? Did you look around? No, they don't. And it's it's at the expense of their employees. well being and it doesn't have to be that way. And I for 1am happy that I see people insisting upon you know, I'm going to find a job that works for me and not the other way around. That is refreshing. It's really refreshing. And hopefully, companies are going to get the hint and it's it's they have to change the way they do business. 

Kristin Wood - 41:00  
Yeah, I'm thinking about as you're talking there. I do have several clients that have that exact thing has happened for this is ridiculous what's being done to me here and what this is doing to me and I need to make a change.

Ralph Andracchio - 41:14 
Yeah. And for for them to be looked down on is atrocious. I think of you know, saying oh, these they don't know they had it so good when these people are so entitled.

Kristin Wood - 41:30
That so many of the people I'm talking to they have now hit a wall where they're they're basically saying and then doubting themselves anymore. They're seeing it through a different lens. Like holy crap, what have I been doing? This is awful. I don't deserve this and are really just shifting their whole thinking which is great.

Ralph Andracchio - 41:53  
Well, that's I think that's what I was getting at with this. The quarantine being the impetus, you know, you get pushed to a point where all your defenses kind of go out the window and I'm like, You know what, nope, I'm not doing it anymore. I don't care what anybody thinks. I don't care people are gonna think of me or what they're gonna say or what happens I just, there's things that are more important than having this job. And a lot of it is people saying I want I want something that is fulfilling. You know, I want something that I'm good at that I don't just, I don't want to get a job just because I need a job. I want to have something where I'm respected and trusted and lifted up and trained and like I want to work for leaders who want me to do better than them. Which is the hallmark of a good leader. Like if you're, if you're running a or you're in charge of a team and all that everybody on that team gets promoted out or does other wonderful things from from you being their manager. You've done your job. Congratulations. That's what it's supposed to look like. You're not supposed to hold people under your thumb and like No, I'm the boss. You know, you're not a boss you're terrible boss. If you say that are your horrible boss, but yeah, it's less less product over people and more people as people 

Kristin Wood - 43:12
People over product 

Ralph Andracchio - 43:13
People over product, right? So if you're if you are somebody who's like in transition and looking for something, and you doubt yourself at all about, you know, Oh, am I doing this right? Maybe I should just go back and take that job I don't want and like suck it up. Don't do that. Like you're on it, you're onto something. There's a lot of people who are doing that. Instead, the more people that insist on roles and careers that are balanced and and complement their life, the more companies will shift the more companies are shifting more of those positions will pop up and become available and then that becomes the norm rather than the exception. And that's hopefully I think, hopefully where we're headed. Yeah. I'm out of breath. Was that Did that make sense? I feel like we touched on a ton of different things

Kristin Wood - 44:06  
We've been bouncing around but that's what we do. I think we made sense,

Ralph Andracchio - 44:10  
I think yeah, I just I want to add I want I not only want to advocate more for people who are in transition, because that's my job. I help people advocate for themselves to change for the better and become their best selves. But I want you know, I want people to start doing it for themselves. Yeah, no, I want people and then spread the love, like help each other. do that too. And it's I know it's tough out there. But there is there is hope. There is Yeah, I like that. I like that. That was good. Yeah. So if you if you are in transition and you need a little bit of help or guidance and want to connect with somebody like us, our contact information is on our homepage. Under this episode. It's always in the show notes. And yeah, keep keep having these conversations. Keep being curious, keep asking questions, and keep pushing back against the system.

Kristin Wood - 45:11
And keep sending us your questions like a jump off from this or jump off from a different episode. We really love getting the emails from people. Yeah. As to what you're thinking.

Ralph Andracchio - 45:21  
Yeah, I we've, we've always been getting really good feedback about this. And we want to we want to connect with people more, so keep it going. Alright, folks, thank you. Thank you. This has been fun. We'll see you. We'll see you next time. On next episode of 

Kristin Wood - 45:37
Hey Let Me Ask You Something

Ralph Andracchio - 45:42
We need to come up with a jingle or something

[OUTRO MUSIC PLAYS AND FADES] - 45:47

END OF EPISODE - 45:57

Transcribed by https://otter.ai